Steve Ball Diary
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Tuesday January 15
Wednesday January 16
Thursday January 17
Friday January 18
Saturday January 195
Sunday January 20
Read the archive
Tuesday January 22
Wednesday January 23
Thursday January 24
Friday January 25
Saturday January 26
Sunday January 27
Monday January 14
The day we've been waiting for: a major unveiling of the past 4 months of AV UI
work since I returned to the borg. A warm welcome back from a receptive
audience. Good things can happen when you deliver what is needed. .
* * *
SBRS rehearsal at HQ -- reviewing the set list for next week's shows. TravisH new contribution continues to excite me to no end. Three part harmonies: finally!! And the Maggie May ending is looping in my background soundtrack. Wonderful...
* * *
SGC full septet again this evening at HQ. More good work and stretching our way(s) of working. Feels like level two up an octave with an experienced team.
* * *
Tuesday January 15
Picking up the pieces after yesterday's performance at work. Feeling the
simultaneous satisfaction/depression that sets in post-show. This is
something I know how to handle: now, the real work begins.
* * *
Wednesday January 16
When I find myself in times of trouble, mother mary comes to me. Letting
it be.
* * *
Thursday January 17
The joke is on me: when things are flying high in one domain, they
simultaneously crash in another. Perhaps it is a universal zero sum law
kicking in with perfect synchronicity.
A midnight crash. Survivors? TBD.
* * *
A couple of months ago, Curt bought a CD and gave it to me. The band is OURS. They have something. Tonight, this song really kicked into high gear for me:
Sometimes
pressure fried the coldest head
bent to the side wishing he was dead
and i would still defend
i would still defend
i give up on it all
i give up on the greed
i give up on the ones
who give up on me
held up by the poor somewhere
there're unaware but i know we are scared
if i was to give in
the fight would soon begin
so i give up on it all
i give up on the greed
i'll give up on the ones
who'll give up on me
sometimes sunshines
sunshine
sometimes the sun shines
sunshine
did you give up on it all
did you give up on the greed
did you give up on the ones
who gave up on me
Buy this CD and listen to this song. This band deserves our attention. Most of the other songs feel like a freshman effort, but this song (and the singer) has something special.
* * *
Friday January 18
Sundress unhappiness.
* * *
A minor schmooze fest at work at the end of a very difficult day. Then, into the metaphorical arms of reliable friends.
God bless our true friends.
* * *
Saturday January 19
A difficult day, all around. Preparation for a sale tomorrow. Cleaning up
some loose ends.
end (end) noun
1.Either extremity of something that has length: the end of the pier.
2.The outside or extreme edge or physical limit; a boundary: the end of town.
3.The point in time when an action, an event, or a phenomenon ceases or is completed; the conclusion: the end of the day.
4.A result; an outcome.
5.Something toward which one strives; a goal. See synonyms at intention.
6.The termination of life or existence; death: “A man awaits his end/Dreading and hoping all” (William Butler Yeats).
7.The ultimate extent; the very limit: the end of one's patience.
8.Slang. The very best; the ultimate: This pizza's the end.
9.A remainder; a remnant.
10.a. A share of a responsibility or obligation: your end of the bargain. b. A particular area of responsibility: in charge of the business end of the campaign.
11.Football. a. Either of the players in the outermost position on the line of scrimmage. b. The position played by such a player.- - -
verb
end·ed, end·ing, ends
verb, transitive
1.To bring to a conclusion.
2.To form the last or concluding part of: the song that ended the performance.
3.To destroy: ended our hopes.
verb, intransitive
1.To come to a finish; cease. See synonyms at complete.
2.To die.
— idiom.
in the end
Eventually; ultimately: All will turn out well in the end.
no end
A great deal: She had no end of stories to tell.
* * *
Pizza dinner with Dean, Patty, William, Lewis, Wendell and TravisM chez Jensen's. Excellent food and compelling conversation(s) about the past and present. Yum.
* * *
Sunday January 20
A major purging today in the "stuff" department.
Letting go of mucho stuff that has been clogging my life. Made a few bucks for SC in the process. Don't want to think about what I spent to "earn" the pidly $$ I "made back" at the garage sale today.
ROI-wise, a horrible deal.
Baggage-wise, a great release.
* * *
home
Monday January 21
An observant correction from Curt:
----- Original Message -----
From: "Curt Golden" <curtgolden@attbi.com>
To: "Steve Ball" <steveball@steveball.com>
Sent: Sunday, January 20, 2002 10:33 PM
Subject: garage sale
<<ROI-wise, a horrible deal. >>
You're using the wrong currency to measure this.
cg
* * *
Up very early. Sleepless. The Ours chorus is still playing full blast in my head. Here is some irony: I'm going to drive it out with the latest Radiohead while I shower.
Worked.
* * *
Reminder: Two SBRS shows this week -- Wed night acoustic at Penny Cafe in Ballard, 8-10, and Thursday night at Pitcairn Gallery in Belltown, 8-10 (plugged-in.)
Obviously, this means I'll have to miss SGC rehearsal on Thursday -- sorry guys!
* * *
Good rehearsals tonight: SBRS, a run-through with only one guitar change. The Shame of Doing Wrong rocks. As does the new dinosaur song with the difficult words.
SGC did some good work this evening too. Experiments with extreme tempos in a few places kept things lively.
* * *
I am really tired. Hoped for a phone call today that never materialized.
* * *
Tuesday January 22
Turns out I was soooo wrong in writing off the rest of the
Ours CD in an entry last week. Curt corrected me today:
----- Original Message -----
From: "Curt Golden"
To: "Steve Ball"
Sent: Tuesday, January 22, 2002 12:00 PM
Subject: OURS
I think the chorus to "Dizzy" may rival anything on the cd.
cg
You are correct sir. I sang this at the song top of my lungs multiple times driving into the city this evening:
Dizzy
We ran, we starved the things
That feel outback
The drunken waters steal from me
If we beat him down, will he stay?
He's a little dizzy
I feel it starting to take me
Where did everybody go?
I need them now
To save me
We fell, when they choked the things that feed
How come... we hurt the one's we need?
Lay down, and stretch upon the sea
If we beat him down, will he stay?
He's a little dizzy
I feel it starting to take me
Where did everybody go?
I need them now
If we beat him down... will he stay?
The chorus really is as good as it gets.
* * *
Feeling somewhat better today, all around. Practicing helps. Being in touch with this plastic/wooden gitbox at least once a day is really the only therapy I need.
More goodness from Curt :
----- Original Message -----
From: Curt Golden
To: SB
Sent: Wednesday, January 23, 2002 11:21 AM
Subject: RE: OURS
Re: songs vs therapy. My experience with latching onto songs as a form of therapy is that when I am in the grips of a powerful emotional state I gravitate toward music that reflects that back to me... expresses what I am feeling (perhaps more powerfully or eloquently than I am able myself). The trap of this is that it reinforces what I already feel or believe. Maybe even romanticizes or elevates it. It does not challenge the underlying mindset (heartset?) to really confront the source of the feeling.
cg
* * *
Received a last minute offer to baby sit for two darling girls this evening, but unfortunately, I was booked.
My booking turned into a private SBRS concert at HQ for SteveT and a friend of his who now works with Derek at the company formerly known as iObjects. A good evening of music and connections. Small world.
* * *
Thursday January 24
My sister sent me this photo last week. Looks like it's been going around.
Not sure where it came from, or who owns the credit:
* * *
Show tonight at Pitcairn Gallery. Looking forward to our sets. No filler in these shows now, and feels like we are really cooking.
* * *
Friday January 25
Good show at Pitcairn last night -- many new faces alongside a few familiar
favorite faces including one reliable smiling, still-employed face from
Mercenary Island with a video camera. One warm face was also wearing my
favorite now ex-leather coat that I sold last week for $10 at the HQ garage
sale.
I won't to into the history of that coat. But some ironies, past and recent, live within.
We played well, the set lengths felt just right, and the song order seemed to work. Of course, this is all probably completely wrong, because, by definition, the performer never really knows how the performance is perceived by those who are not blushing and thinking about the history of a coat that they used to own while making up harmonies on the fly while remembering complicated, non-rhyming words to a new song while playing intricately leaping asymmetrical patterns in five.
It's hard to see the show when you are in it.
The Kneeling Down encore felt as strong as it's ever been. And TravisH new song still kills me. Have I mentioned to power of three part harmonies lately? For more on this, see the Temptations, the Beach Boys, the Story (Jonatha counts as two), CSN, Yes, the Eagles, and N'Sync. (Whoops - I'm sure I just alienated what was left of an already dwindling diary audience.) Oh, well -- I'm sure there are many cooler, more politically correct 3-part harmony references I could make here, but lately, I care not about being or pretending to be cool.
* * *
Up late on a necessary phone call. Up early too. Sleepless. On and into the day.
* * *
Saturday January 26
What a day. Feeling a bit like the Tom Cruise character in Vanilla Sky
-- not quite sure what is real today.
I experienced a minor time warp watching Hideyo, Paul, and Bert (and tour manager, Bruce)pile out of their van in front of my place in Belltown. How may times have I seen/been with these guys stepping out of a van?? Too many to count right now.
Great to catch up briefly before setting them to rest before their certain-to-be-delayed-soundcheck in my now swollen apartment. Four purring Powerbooks in my place is just over the legal limit.
* * *
Feeling better later in the day. More grounded.
The CGT show provided an excellent blast of unifying energy for me. Great company in the audience too. An unspoken reunion/communion of sorts.
Bob Hay (really, the first Prometheus/SBRS groupie) was there -- had not seen him for years. Introducing him to Peter Dervin was also a complete networking pleasure. Also, seeing Jarrod Kaplan with the CGT was another strange closing loop from their first introduction in 1997 at Broadway Performance Hall. All in all, an evening of intersections.
Spent a nice night at a dear friend's place while the CGT camped out at mine.
* * *
Sunday January 27
Afternoon: home again, CGT already on their flights back home.
Realized when I came home that whoever was sleeping in my bedroom was probably
shocked unexpectedly by the Steve Reich CD that is in my "alarm clock" and set
to begin playing at 6:30am. Oops.
Quick bedding clean-up and preparation for massive poker attack chez Pelota. A full house tonight with TobinB, TravisM, CurtG, DavidLV, BobW, JaxieB, and TomW. With eight players, there was $40 at stake in the $5.00 per player pot. I came out up $4.25.
Overall, a surprisingly satisfying weekend. No life-changing events or major drama -- just some quality time spent with good people.
* * *
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